Why Courtroom Etiquette Matters
Walking into a courtroom for the first time is nerve-wracking, especially if you’re representing yourself. You might not know when to stand, how to talk to the judge, or what’s actually allowed.
How you behave in court matters. Judges notice everything. Being respectful, prepared, and composed shows you take the process seriously. Rude behaviour, interruptions, or a lack of preparation can hurt your credibility, even if your case is strong.
General Behaviour Rules
These rules apply every time you step into an Ontario courtroom:
- Be on time. Arrive at least 15 to 30 minutes early. Check in with the court clerk and find out which courtroom you need. Being late can result in your matter being adjourned or decided without you.
- Turn off your phone. Phones must be on silent or off completely. Ringing phones disrupt proceedings and won’t be tolerated. In many courtrooms, you can’t use your phone at all, not even for texting or scrolling.
- No food or drinks. Water in a clear bottle is usually fine, but no coffee cups, snacks, or gum.
- No hats or sunglasses. Remove hats, hoods, and sunglasses before entering the courtroom. Religious head coverings are an exception.
- Speak only when it’s your turn. Don’t interrupt the judge, the other party, or their lawyer. You’ll be given your opportunity to speak.
- Keep your emotions in check. Family court deals with deeply personal issues, and it’s natural to feel angry, frustrated, or upset. But outbursts, eye-rolling, sighing loudly, or making faces won’t help your case. Stay calm at all times.
When to Stand and When to Sit
Standing and sitting protocol can be confusing if you’ve never been to court before. Here’s a simple breakdown:
- Stand when the judge enters or leaves the courtroom. The court clerk will usually announce the judge’s arrival by saying something like “All rise” or “Order in court.” Everyone stands until the judge is seated and tells you to sit down.
- Stand when you’re speaking to the judge. Any time you’re addressing the judge directly, whether you’re answering a question, making a statement, or presenting your case, you should be on your feet.
- Sit when the other party is speaking. While the other side is presenting their case or their lawyer is talking, stay seated and listen quietly.
- Stand when the judge is giving a decision or order. If the judge is delivering a ruling, stand as a sign of respect.
If you’re not sure whether to stand or sit, watch what others in the courtroom are doing and follow their lead. The court clerk can also guide you.
How to Address and Speak to the Judge
Knowing how to properly address the judge, what phrases to use, and how to respond when you’re spoken to is a big part of courtroom etiquette. We’ve put together a full guide on this topic: How to Address a Judge in Ontario Family Court. It covers everything from the correct title to use, to tips on speaking clearly and concisely when it’s your turn.
Phone and Electronics Rules
Different courthouses have slightly different rules about electronics, but here are the general guidelines:
- Phones on silent. No exceptions. If your phone rings during proceedings, it will be noticed.
- No recording. You’re not allowed to record court proceedings. No audio, no video, no photos. Violating this rule can result in being held in contempt of court.
- Laptops and tablets. In some courtrooms, you may be allowed to use a laptop or tablet to reference your notes. Ask the court clerk before proceedings begin if you’re unsure.
- No social media. Don’t post about your court proceedings on social media while you’re in the courthouse. Be very careful about posting anything about your family court case online at any time. It can be used against you.
What NOT to Do in Court
Beyond the basics, here are specific behaviours that will hurt your credibility:
- Don’t interrupt. This is the number one mistake self-represented litigants make. Wait your turn, even if the other party is saying something you strongly disagree with. You’ll get your chance to respond.
- Don’t speak to the other party directly. All communication goes through the judge. Even if the other party says something provocative, don’t turn to them and respond. Address the judge instead.
- Don’t make personal attacks. Calling the other party names, bringing up irrelevant personal matters, or being vindictive won’t impress the judge. Stick to the facts and the legal issues.
- Don’t bring an audience. Courtrooms are generally open to the public, but bringing a group of friends or family to “support” you can backfire. It can feel intimidating to the other party and create unnecessary tension.
- Don’t coach or signal. If you have a support person in the gallery, don’t pass notes, whisper, or signal to them during proceedings.
Bringing Children to Court
Don’t bring your children to family court. Family court proceedings often involve sensitive discussions about custody, parenting, and finances that children shouldn’t hear. Judges take a very dim view of parents who bring their children to court.
If childcare is a barrier to attending, here are some options:
- Ask a family member or friend to watch your children
- Check if the courthouse has a childcare program (some do)
- Contact your local community legal clinic for resources
- Ask the court clerk if accommodations can be made
Managing Stress and Emotions
Family court is stressful. You’re dealing with issues that affect your children, your finances, and your future. It’s natural to feel overwhelmed.
Here are some strategies to help you stay composed:
- Prepare thoroughly. The more prepared you are, the more confident you’ll feel. Review your documents, practise what you want to say, and know your key points.
- Breathe. If you feel yourself getting emotional, take a slow, deep breath before responding. It’s okay to pause for a moment to collect your thoughts.
- Bring water. Having water to sip can calm your nerves and give you a moment to think before responding.
- Focus on your children. Remember why you’re there: to get the best outcome for your kids. That mindset can help you stay focused and avoid getting drawn into personal conflicts.
- Take notes. Writing things down gives your hands something to do, helps you stay focused, and ensures you remember important details.
- Ask for a break if you need one. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, you can politely ask the judge for a brief recess. Judges generally understand that self-represented parties may need a moment.
Quick Reference: Courtroom Etiquette Checklist
- Arrive 15 to 30 minutes early
- Dress professionally
- Phone on silent or off
- No food, gum, hats, or sunglasses
- Stand when the judge enters, leaves, or speaks to you
- Address the judge as “Your Honour”
- Speak only when it’s your turn
- Be honest, concise, and respectful
- Never interrupt
- Don’t bring children
- No recording of any kind
- Keep emotions in check
Disclaimer: This content is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for legal advice. If you need legal assistance, please consult a licensed lawyer.
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